by Lily Crowder
I know a dear friend with six boys! No girls! They are a tribe of vivacious, hungry, wild, tender, precious boys from the ages of thirteen down to one. Can you picture their home? The smells? The sights? The toilet? They are all disciplined polite, loving but non- the –less, boys.
As a mother of two boys, who are kinetic daredevils to the core, I am constantly holding my breath or closing my eyes at their latest stunt. I heard one woman joke by saying, “ raising boys is like riding a roller-coaster upside down, backwards in the dark.” If you are a mother of a boy you can probably relate to that analogy, in one way or another. Even the mellow, tame male-child is full of wonderful unpredictability.
The amount of high surfaces my boys have jumped off of, sharp objects they have ran with, dirty things they have touched and then ate, I would have to say that it is a miracle that they are alive at the end of each day! I used to joke when my boys were toddlers by saying, “every day my main goal is to keep my boys alive.” It was a funny statement by true!
By the time my eldest son could crawl he could move faster than a Pink Floyd laser show, this way and that faster than lightning, I bet with all my running after him I was probably thinner then. In addition to his great speed on all fours was the fact that everything went into his mouth, he was always chewing on something random, I would cringe at the foreign mystery objects I would retrieve from his mouth. One day we discovered that his normal breathing pattern sounded like a squeak, rather than a smooth breath, he sounded like a squeaker toy! When we took him in to have him examined and x-rayed they found a small rock logged in his bronchial tube and centimeters away from blocking his windpipe! He had put the rock in his mouth and had somehow exasperated it into his bronchial tube, causing the mysterious squeaking sound. He had emergency surgery and we have now have the small rock in his baby book titled, “the six thousand dollar rock.”
Our boys have become a reminder that even out of the womb, in their toddler years, through their adolescences and into their manhood, their safety and well being is out of our control. In fact, every aspect of their lives is ultimately out of our control. I have observed my own mother and other mothers with their sons as they grow up, you can see the constant tension and release, as she has to let him go. There is nothing worse than a mom who tries to micro-manage her son, she is meant to let him go and he is meant to be free.
“Lift up your eyes on high and see! Who has created these? He Who brings out their host by number and calls them all by name; through the greatness of His might and because He is strong in power, not one is missing or lacks anything.” ( Isaiah 40:26 AMP)
A mother is constantly in a state of remembering who is in control.
The need for us to acknowledge God’s Soveirngty and Grace over our children and the Holy Spirits ability to lead you as you parent becomes the most essential ingredient in every season of our children’s lives and in our calling as parents. It is with an expectation that their creator only has the best in mind for His creation that we find rest as parents. I don’t hand my kids over to God (who were never mine to begin with) and think, “well, I hope it works out!” I am confident that the same Love that worked for me will work for them. His love overcame all of my parent’s mistakes and shortcomings raising me, as well as all my mistakes and shortcomings raising my children. I can pray for wisdom and guidance in every step of my parenting, and it is good to do so, but all confidence is ultimately resting on His hand in our lives. We may be compelled as parents to love, protect, instruct, encourage and nurture our children. But there is a hand’s down agreement that the end result in every area of their lives is reliant on the Grace and sovereignty of God.
For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome. (Jeremiah 29:11 AMP.)